Today is my birthday.
It seems that on birthdays or other of life's milestones it is in our nature to wax a bit nostalgic, so please indulge me as I ramble through some random thoughts of my own self serving nostalgia so that I may feel like I am actually sharing things that are relevant to you as well.
If life is about learning and doing better and climbing obstacles, then I consider my life the finest university. I have made good decisions, bad decisions, and decisions that seemingly have been neither good or bad (should I have the turkey or roast beef today?)
I have reveled in the good decisions. Learned sometimes very painful lessons from the bad decisions, and have learned that even the neutral decisions have had consequences, even if I don't realize the neutral decisions directly.
I would have learned nothing in life if I have not realized that anything I decide not only affects myself, but every decision affects others as well.
My life is a part of a grand scheme of your life, and your life is a grand scheme in my life.
We are all connected.
The myths of "rugged individualism" and "pulling yourself up by your boot straps" are myths hoarded by the greedy seemingly perpetuated to the masses so that those needing help would be too ashamed to ask for it. These myths are also the dogma for those who have received help from the time they were young, but have gotten their very large piece of "the pie" but still perpetuate the myth so that their "pie" remains very large.
You are not a "rugged individual" and you have never "pulled yourself up.." you and I have had help every step of the way throughout our lifetimes. By the very fact that you are reading this and I am writing this; the fact that you and I have survived to this age, no matter what age you are, means that someone has fed and clothed you and educated you. You are not here right now by your own merit. We all need each other to continue to exist and survive.
This day, being my birthday, has caused me to remind myself to be less selfish and exclusive, and to be more selfless and inclusive. Less dogmatic and more to seek gnosis and to find whatever the truth is no matter WHAT the truth is and to walk the path that gnosis and truth leads me to no matter what the path is.
So, welcome to my birthday nostalgia. I am hopeful you will find peace and joy and happiness in any path and in any decision you choose to take.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Friday, May 7, 2010
Saving Ducks, Eating Chicken
A peculiar event happened to me today, but I must preface this with events leading to today.
Rewind to a few weeks ago when;whilst doing my job as a heating and air conditioning technician, I was on a roof of an indoor pool that is adjacent to a park that has a pond that attracts ducks. It has been mating season for the ducks so also, it has been nesting season.
While maintaining the equipment on the roof I noticed a duck that seemed to be loitering around a certain machine, and would get a little "quacky" whenever I approached the machine. Upon further inspection I realized this was the mother duck and she was protesting my vicinity of her nest and 5 eggs. "Hmm.." I thought. "How the fuck is she going to get her ducklings off of here?"
In subsequent visits to this roof, I continued to ask myself this question. I also cursed her as a bad mother duck. Though she never did abandon the nest. She stayed with the eggs every time I was there, sitting on her eggs and seemingly tending to making sure her young hatched.
Fast forward to today. Weeks have passed and I return to do a repair on a machine on this same roof that I have been awaiting (and received) a part for.
The mother duck (I recognized her because she had some unique black and white markings) was now on the ground near where I parked my vehicle. She was buzzing me and making all sorts of noise. "Shut the fuck up." I said to her as it WAS early morning and I really did not want her annoyance. I took a few steps and realized "Oh shit! I bet I am gonna find her ducklings on the roof."
I climbed the access ladder, opened the roof hatch and pulled my tools and part up on a rope I secured everything to before the climb, as I was pulling, here was the mother duck again. Now on the roof with me being noisy, seeming yelling at me that I was too close to her young.
I checked the nest and found it empty. I walked the roof, looking, searching the ground.
There they were. 4 of the 5 eggs are now ducklings.
I found myself in a dilemma of what to do. There no water on the roof. It's Friday and so even if I put water up on the roof, it will be gone by Monday, and these damned ducklings will haunt my mind all weekend. I know damned well they'd be dead by Monday if I left them where they were.
They were huddled near the edge, a small wall the only thing keeping gravity from taking them to their death. I did not know if I approached whether they could jump over, so I retreated.
I climbed off the roof and went to a fire station that is across the street and asked them if they did duck rescues. "Just leave them there." The fire man said crushing the image of any cat up a tree rescues we all have seen in the movies.
I called a co-worker who told me the same thing "let nature be nature." and he also called me "a big softy" I ignored the chiding and the advice.
I realized I had a box that my replacement part came in just downstairs. I retrieved the box and cut 2 square holes in the flaps to put my rope through. My mission was to get the ducklings, put them in the box, then lower the box down with the rope, climb down, and release the ducklings to their mom. All whilst making sure they did not do a suicide dive off the roof.
I approached, the ducklings tried to jump over the small wall, but fortunately they were too small. I gently cupped one, then two, setting them gently in the box. Three and four made a run for it, but tripped themselves on some stones that cover the roof. I quickly scooped them up, too and put them in the box. All the while they were sounding their tiny alarm to mom...who I have not seen for a while. I thought for sure she'd be screaming at me as well.
I tied a nice secure know through the flaps on the box and lowered the box to the ground. I climbed down to the box, I saw mom, took the box nearer to her while she screamed at me, and released the ducklings on some grass there.
Immediately mom got the ducklings to the pond. They followed her closely and with intent. Looks like they were swimming great and dad showed up, too.
It felt right to interfere with nature. I realize that some things should be left alone, but my conscience would not have let me have a nice weekend without helping.
On my way home, I stopped and got a chicken dinner from the market deli.
My conscience does not bother me about that.
Rewind to a few weeks ago when;whilst doing my job as a heating and air conditioning technician, I was on a roof of an indoor pool that is adjacent to a park that has a pond that attracts ducks. It has been mating season for the ducks so also, it has been nesting season.
While maintaining the equipment on the roof I noticed a duck that seemed to be loitering around a certain machine, and would get a little "quacky" whenever I approached the machine. Upon further inspection I realized this was the mother duck and she was protesting my vicinity of her nest and 5 eggs. "Hmm.." I thought. "How the fuck is she going to get her ducklings off of here?"
In subsequent visits to this roof, I continued to ask myself this question. I also cursed her as a bad mother duck. Though she never did abandon the nest. She stayed with the eggs every time I was there, sitting on her eggs and seemingly tending to making sure her young hatched.
Fast forward to today. Weeks have passed and I return to do a repair on a machine on this same roof that I have been awaiting (and received) a part for.
The mother duck (I recognized her because she had some unique black and white markings) was now on the ground near where I parked my vehicle. She was buzzing me and making all sorts of noise. "Shut the fuck up." I said to her as it WAS early morning and I really did not want her annoyance. I took a few steps and realized "Oh shit! I bet I am gonna find her ducklings on the roof."
I climbed the access ladder, opened the roof hatch and pulled my tools and part up on a rope I secured everything to before the climb, as I was pulling, here was the mother duck again. Now on the roof with me being noisy, seeming yelling at me that I was too close to her young.
I checked the nest and found it empty. I walked the roof, looking, searching the ground.
There they were. 4 of the 5 eggs are now ducklings.
I found myself in a dilemma of what to do. There no water on the roof. It's Friday and so even if I put water up on the roof, it will be gone by Monday, and these damned ducklings will haunt my mind all weekend. I know damned well they'd be dead by Monday if I left them where they were.
They were huddled near the edge, a small wall the only thing keeping gravity from taking them to their death. I did not know if I approached whether they could jump over, so I retreated.
I climbed off the roof and went to a fire station that is across the street and asked them if they did duck rescues. "Just leave them there." The fire man said crushing the image of any cat up a tree rescues we all have seen in the movies.
I called a co-worker who told me the same thing "let nature be nature." and he also called me "a big softy" I ignored the chiding and the advice.
I realized I had a box that my replacement part came in just downstairs. I retrieved the box and cut 2 square holes in the flaps to put my rope through. My mission was to get the ducklings, put them in the box, then lower the box down with the rope, climb down, and release the ducklings to their mom. All whilst making sure they did not do a suicide dive off the roof.
I approached, the ducklings tried to jump over the small wall, but fortunately they were too small. I gently cupped one, then two, setting them gently in the box. Three and four made a run for it, but tripped themselves on some stones that cover the roof. I quickly scooped them up, too and put them in the box. All the while they were sounding their tiny alarm to mom...who I have not seen for a while. I thought for sure she'd be screaming at me as well.
I tied a nice secure know through the flaps on the box and lowered the box to the ground. I climbed down to the box, I saw mom, took the box nearer to her while she screamed at me, and released the ducklings on some grass there.
Immediately mom got the ducklings to the pond. They followed her closely and with intent. Looks like they were swimming great and dad showed up, too.
It felt right to interfere with nature. I realize that some things should be left alone, but my conscience would not have let me have a nice weekend without helping.
On my way home, I stopped and got a chicken dinner from the market deli.
My conscience does not bother me about that.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
On Being in Pain.....
The most painful thing in years happened to me last week when; through bad nerves and being worried, I found myself chewing on taffy during the day, and grinding my teeth at night.
I remember the very painful culmination of my dilemma. It was in the very early morning hours when I rolled over with force while at the same time grinding my already aggravated teeth.
This was the moment when my already weakened upper left molar (which had subsequent major work on it and was already weak) became severely cracked. I tried to ignore it, but from that moment on, this cracked tooth was not only going to cause severe pain and keep me sleepless for 4 nights. This tooth was also going to get very infected as the crack exposed my gums and sinuses to all the bacteria that my own, or any other human mouth harbors.
The bacteria and infection caused the tooth to become higher than the teeth surrounding it, so that anytime I bit down, I was pressing very hard on that sole tooth and the infection behind it.
The pain was unbearable. I don't know exactly why I did not go to the dentist sooner;I think it was denial and sleeplessness that caused the mind to be irrational, as well as his absence from the office.
It's a strange situation the human psyche finds itself in when so much pain is present.
From cussing an imperfect god that would make such a thing as "these fucking teeth!!" To pleading with a more perfect god for help. To finally doing the only smart thing and going to the dentist, who with his skill can relieve the pain and set the patient on their way much happier ( though poorer) than when they came in.
So, after a few days, and a scare yesterday that made me realize just how ill I was (I got severely dizzy in the shower after pressing on to do a lot of household chores all day) I realized that the human body is a wonder and a vulnerable vessel all at the same time. I have had the good fortune in life to have escaped illnesses that many others have succumbed to. I have often taken my good health for granted, while being thankful that I rarely ever get colds of flu that many others I know seem to battle every year. Save for the occasional migraine, I have been fortunate in health and life.
So, being laid up this past week made me realize that I really AM a fortunate person. I also realized that I do at times press myself too far and in too many directions. From work to school, to the Masonic meetings to the activities with the kids....it has been a whirlwind of activity for me these past few months.
I have decided to slow it down a bit. Concentrating mostly on school and maybe not striving so hard to become a Mason. This will come in time. But graduating has to be my first goal in my personal life right now. I am very close to this goal with a graduation date of spring 2011.
Life is good!! Take stock of what you have and strive to make life better for you and everyone you care about.
Til next time!!
I remember the very painful culmination of my dilemma. It was in the very early morning hours when I rolled over with force while at the same time grinding my already aggravated teeth.
This was the moment when my already weakened upper left molar (which had subsequent major work on it and was already weak) became severely cracked. I tried to ignore it, but from that moment on, this cracked tooth was not only going to cause severe pain and keep me sleepless for 4 nights. This tooth was also going to get very infected as the crack exposed my gums and sinuses to all the bacteria that my own, or any other human mouth harbors.
The bacteria and infection caused the tooth to become higher than the teeth surrounding it, so that anytime I bit down, I was pressing very hard on that sole tooth and the infection behind it.
The pain was unbearable. I don't know exactly why I did not go to the dentist sooner;I think it was denial and sleeplessness that caused the mind to be irrational, as well as his absence from the office.
It's a strange situation the human psyche finds itself in when so much pain is present.
From cussing an imperfect god that would make such a thing as "these fucking teeth!!" To pleading with a more perfect god for help. To finally doing the only smart thing and going to the dentist, who with his skill can relieve the pain and set the patient on their way much happier ( though poorer) than when they came in.
So, after a few days, and a scare yesterday that made me realize just how ill I was (I got severely dizzy in the shower after pressing on to do a lot of household chores all day) I realized that the human body is a wonder and a vulnerable vessel all at the same time. I have had the good fortune in life to have escaped illnesses that many others have succumbed to. I have often taken my good health for granted, while being thankful that I rarely ever get colds of flu that many others I know seem to battle every year. Save for the occasional migraine, I have been fortunate in health and life.
So, being laid up this past week made me realize that I really AM a fortunate person. I also realized that I do at times press myself too far and in too many directions. From work to school, to the Masonic meetings to the activities with the kids....it has been a whirlwind of activity for me these past few months.
I have decided to slow it down a bit. Concentrating mostly on school and maybe not striving so hard to become a Mason. This will come in time. But graduating has to be my first goal in my personal life right now. I am very close to this goal with a graduation date of spring 2011.
Life is good!! Take stock of what you have and strive to make life better for you and everyone you care about.
Til next time!!
Friday, October 23, 2009
Heads, Sparks, and a CELL PHONE Flies at the Alice Cooper "Theatre of Death" Show
Wendover, Nevada Peppermill Concert Hall Oct. 17, 2009
A Memoir/Review of Alice Cooper's Mesmerizing Performance and my Journey to that Point in Time.
The small details I will leave alone, but I must tell you that the trip to Wendover, Nevada from Salt Lake City, Utah is not a thing to get excited about. It's a white, barren, desert landscape. Miles of nothingness and nothing would ever grow in the salt that makes up the desert expanse that is the Bonneville Salt Flats.
I have driven through this desert many times, and sober except for the adrenaline thrill of the gambling that awaited me in the past, and of taking my Z24 Cavalier past 100 MPH on the way. The ride home was always less thrilling, as I would have lost money I should not have been gambling with to start with. I was in my mid twenties and I was sort of a lost soul with a gaping emptiness I really did not know how to fill. In those days I always did everything to excess. Drinking, joking, searching,needing wanting, but never caring enough about my 1st marriage and it withered away. And my 20's withered away, too.
In my 30's I found myself divorced and struggling. What material things I did not lose, I gave away. I found myself leaving Utah and my kids for about a year. I went back to Detroit to live with my Dad for awhile, ended up in Canada (long story) and eventually living in a park until a long Greyhound bus ride brought me back to Utah as a new, and lost, and very different person. I found my 2nd wife not too long after my journey back to Utah. She helped me fight my demons of self doubt and provided the shovel and dirt so I could fill in my gaping emptiness.
I don't live in excess anymore. Actually I live a very minimal lifestyle. Save for a pretty good coin collection, and a large number of books, you would never find that I could be judged by what I own. I get a thrill these days by gaining knowledge and writing rambling blogs.
I could not start to write about my trip to Wendover to see Alice Cooper without mentioning all of that. It was very heavy on my mind that day, and for me, a large part of the story of seeing Alice again. The last time I saw him was in Detroit, October, 1987, as a 20 year old, just before I moved out to Utah. When I saw the ad for his show in Wendover, I HAD to go and see him, bought my ticket right away.
That was the journey that has led me to the trip on Oct. 17, 2009 (a synopsis anyway) so now, let me tell you about that day.
This time out to Wendover (my first time in many years) I decided to take a "fun bus" which for 15 dollars picks people up in Utah and delivers them through the desert to a casino where you are given a free meal, 5 dollars cash back, a free drink, and some other amenities that is actually worth more than 15 dollars. I decided that I was going to have a few drinks before getting on the bus, too. This could only enhance the trip (and it did). You guessed it, due to Utah liquor laws, they could not serve drinks on the bus. My friend Steve agreed to meet me on the bus near his home ( this almost did not happen, damned bus drivers! Long story here, too.) but the bus did pick him up and we rode out there together. This was at about 230, the show started at 7, so there was plenty of time.
The alcohol in my system helped me greatly to tolerate the corny jokes the bus hostess felt obligated to share. The alcohol also helped me to tolerate the bingo game I could never win, and I ended up distracting Steve from his game, too. It was his own fault though for riding out there sober. We finally arrived at the casino.
When the bus pulled in, it was about 4 pm. We were given our amenties by the casino hostess and we filed into the casino searching for the rest room, slot machines, and the buffet in that order.
There was something missing for me. It was the thrill of being in a casino. This was a theme I could not get over as long as I was there. My gambling was controlled by my common sense. When I did win, I mostly cashed out. I told Steve how different this felt for me, and he tolerated my speeches, but I was mostly talking for me anyway. I think he knew that.
The buffet dinner was fantastic. Shrimp, prime rib, some mexican food, wonderful chocolate cream pie, all included with my bus ticket. I had a rum and coke, too...oh and my flask full of tequila was with me as well.
So, after Steve and I ate, we gambled a little more. Steve won about 70 dollars. I won about 40. It was then time to make our way to the concert hall, a short walk through the parking lot. I had my ticket mailed to me, Steve put his in will call, so we went and got his ticket right away. We had about 30 minutes still before the doors opened. We wandered and joked as I drank the content of my flask. We saw some stretch limos come from the gated area that was back stage. Some hefty security guards were wandering around, too. A few people kept asking us if we had extra tickets ( sold out show) and I briefly wondered if I should have bought more just TO sell.
Doors opened, we bought t-shirts and got seated. Steve sat on the other side of the very intimate venue (seats 1,950 people) I got seated and noticed a guy that looked like a 1970's version of a young Elton John....with a pretty blonde by his side. My first thoughts were if size DOES matter, certainly looks DON'T matter.
After a brief period, the houselights dimmed, and the school bell rang curtain came down and it was Alice, in top form and in an intimate venue where I could actually SEE him. SCHOOL'S OUT FOR SUMMER!! But, not really. School just BEGUN. Alice taught the audience that night what a rock and roll show SHOULD BE. Not just band playing instruments and a guy singing songs, but a PERFORMANCE. From the skeleton clad stage hands that rolled out the guillotine, the huge syringe, the death spikes, the gallows that killed Alice all night, to the menacing nurse that made sure Alice was put away while she made every man in the place fall in some sort of strange love with her, to Alice's mesmerizing stage presence and his non-tolerance of having a cell phone camera from a jack ass in the front row stuck in his face (he smacked that damned camera so hard out of the assholes hand that it flew a good six feet away) Alice taught us lessons all night long.
As soon as he and his very tight band rocked you to your core with "Under My Wheels" you were soon swooning to "Only Women Bleed" and "I'll Never Cry".
Fantastic, a marvel, still at the top of his game.
Alice taught me a personal lesson that night. The thrill I did not feel in the casino was soon felt in the concert hall with Alice. Alice taught me that I really am not the same person I used to be. I have grown, I have learned and I have conquered all sorts of obstacles that had brought me to that night with him as my teacher.
I hope some day people will describe me as "fantastic, a marvel, still at the top of his game."
But I know I will never forget the night Alice, and the trip to Wendover, taught me about how the journey makes the trips in life memorable.
See him if you can!!
alicecooper.com
A Memoir/Review of Alice Cooper's Mesmerizing Performance and my Journey to that Point in Time.
The small details I will leave alone, but I must tell you that the trip to Wendover, Nevada from Salt Lake City, Utah is not a thing to get excited about. It's a white, barren, desert landscape. Miles of nothingness and nothing would ever grow in the salt that makes up the desert expanse that is the Bonneville Salt Flats.
I have driven through this desert many times, and sober except for the adrenaline thrill of the gambling that awaited me in the past, and of taking my Z24 Cavalier past 100 MPH on the way. The ride home was always less thrilling, as I would have lost money I should not have been gambling with to start with. I was in my mid twenties and I was sort of a lost soul with a gaping emptiness I really did not know how to fill. In those days I always did everything to excess. Drinking, joking, searching,needing wanting, but never caring enough about my 1st marriage and it withered away. And my 20's withered away, too.
In my 30's I found myself divorced and struggling. What material things I did not lose, I gave away. I found myself leaving Utah and my kids for about a year. I went back to Detroit to live with my Dad for awhile, ended up in Canada (long story) and eventually living in a park until a long Greyhound bus ride brought me back to Utah as a new, and lost, and very different person. I found my 2nd wife not too long after my journey back to Utah. She helped me fight my demons of self doubt and provided the shovel and dirt so I could fill in my gaping emptiness.
I don't live in excess anymore. Actually I live a very minimal lifestyle. Save for a pretty good coin collection, and a large number of books, you would never find that I could be judged by what I own. I get a thrill these days by gaining knowledge and writing rambling blogs.
I could not start to write about my trip to Wendover to see Alice Cooper without mentioning all of that. It was very heavy on my mind that day, and for me, a large part of the story of seeing Alice again. The last time I saw him was in Detroit, October, 1987, as a 20 year old, just before I moved out to Utah. When I saw the ad for his show in Wendover, I HAD to go and see him, bought my ticket right away.
That was the journey that has led me to the trip on Oct. 17, 2009 (a synopsis anyway) so now, let me tell you about that day.
This time out to Wendover (my first time in many years) I decided to take a "fun bus" which for 15 dollars picks people up in Utah and delivers them through the desert to a casino where you are given a free meal, 5 dollars cash back, a free drink, and some other amenities that is actually worth more than 15 dollars. I decided that I was going to have a few drinks before getting on the bus, too. This could only enhance the trip (and it did). You guessed it, due to Utah liquor laws, they could not serve drinks on the bus. My friend Steve agreed to meet me on the bus near his home ( this almost did not happen, damned bus drivers! Long story here, too.) but the bus did pick him up and we rode out there together. This was at about 230, the show started at 7, so there was plenty of time.
The alcohol in my system helped me greatly to tolerate the corny jokes the bus hostess felt obligated to share. The alcohol also helped me to tolerate the bingo game I could never win, and I ended up distracting Steve from his game, too. It was his own fault though for riding out there sober. We finally arrived at the casino.
When the bus pulled in, it was about 4 pm. We were given our amenties by the casino hostess and we filed into the casino searching for the rest room, slot machines, and the buffet in that order.
There was something missing for me. It was the thrill of being in a casino. This was a theme I could not get over as long as I was there. My gambling was controlled by my common sense. When I did win, I mostly cashed out. I told Steve how different this felt for me, and he tolerated my speeches, but I was mostly talking for me anyway. I think he knew that.
The buffet dinner was fantastic. Shrimp, prime rib, some mexican food, wonderful chocolate cream pie, all included with my bus ticket. I had a rum and coke, too...oh and my flask full of tequila was with me as well.
So, after Steve and I ate, we gambled a little more. Steve won about 70 dollars. I won about 40. It was then time to make our way to the concert hall, a short walk through the parking lot. I had my ticket mailed to me, Steve put his in will call, so we went and got his ticket right away. We had about 30 minutes still before the doors opened. We wandered and joked as I drank the content of my flask. We saw some stretch limos come from the gated area that was back stage. Some hefty security guards were wandering around, too. A few people kept asking us if we had extra tickets ( sold out show) and I briefly wondered if I should have bought more just TO sell.
Doors opened, we bought t-shirts and got seated. Steve sat on the other side of the very intimate venue (seats 1,950 people) I got seated and noticed a guy that looked like a 1970's version of a young Elton John....with a pretty blonde by his side. My first thoughts were if size DOES matter, certainly looks DON'T matter.
After a brief period, the houselights dimmed, and the school bell rang curtain came down and it was Alice, in top form and in an intimate venue where I could actually SEE him. SCHOOL'S OUT FOR SUMMER!! But, not really. School just BEGUN. Alice taught the audience that night what a rock and roll show SHOULD BE. Not just band playing instruments and a guy singing songs, but a PERFORMANCE. From the skeleton clad stage hands that rolled out the guillotine, the huge syringe, the death spikes, the gallows that killed Alice all night, to the menacing nurse that made sure Alice was put away while she made every man in the place fall in some sort of strange love with her, to Alice's mesmerizing stage presence and his non-tolerance of having a cell phone camera from a jack ass in the front row stuck in his face (he smacked that damned camera so hard out of the assholes hand that it flew a good six feet away) Alice taught us lessons all night long.
As soon as he and his very tight band rocked you to your core with "Under My Wheels" you were soon swooning to "Only Women Bleed" and "I'll Never Cry".
Fantastic, a marvel, still at the top of his game.
Alice taught me a personal lesson that night. The thrill I did not feel in the casino was soon felt in the concert hall with Alice. Alice taught me that I really am not the same person I used to be. I have grown, I have learned and I have conquered all sorts of obstacles that had brought me to that night with him as my teacher.
I hope some day people will describe me as "fantastic, a marvel, still at the top of his game."
But I know I will never forget the night Alice, and the trip to Wendover, taught me about how the journey makes the trips in life memorable.
See him if you can!!
alicecooper.com
Friday, October 16, 2009
"All the young girls love Alice...." Alice Cooper, tomorrow!!
Ok, so it's a little weird to throw a few of Elton John's lines from his ode to lesbianism into a blog about Alice Cooper....but life is a little weird, too!
Tomorrow at 2 I'll be heading west on a fun bus to (1) meet up with my friend Steve, and (2) head out to see Alice Cooper at the Peppermill Concert Hall. The show is at 7, and it's a 2 hour road trip, so there will be plenty of time for some drinking, gambling and a buffet meal before the show starts.
I have been excited all week for the show. I have not seen Alice perform in 22 years, and this is the first time in about ten years I have crossed state lines. I don't get out much anymore as my financial situation and school and family obligations don't permit me as much fun as I used to have, so it will be nice to actually go have some "fun" for a change.
The road trip to Wendover, Nevada is nothing at all to write home about. It's a barren desert landscape that has three highlights. (1) There is a surreal otherwordly feel to it as the dirt around the road is mostly salt, and at dusk, and with a bright moon, it's actually (sort of) inspiring. Think Joshua Tree landscape without the band and no trees or any living thing.(2) The "famous tree". Not THAT tree, but an artists idea of a bad christmas tree, or actually bad xmas tree ornaments. Sort of Dali-ish, but not as interesting. It's only a highlight because when one sees that tree, it means you are really close to getting to Wendover and your chosen buffet or casino. It also means you are about to NOT be in Utah anymore...which is a grand thrill on it's own. (3) You (kinda) get to see the Bonneville Salt Flats. I am not a car freak so it means almost nothing to me, but hey, it IS famous and one does get to be near it. Think having a pic with Bono's hair dresser while Bono is too busy to be bothered with you, and you get how I feel.
So, I am very excited. I have read all sorts of accolades about the show, and to see the show in an intimate (1950 people hall) atmosphere is a thrilling prospect to me as well. OH and yeah, the flask will be going on the long ride, too. It can only make it better :)
I'll post a review of the show as soon as time allows.
Have fun y'all!!
Tomorrow at 2 I'll be heading west on a fun bus to (1) meet up with my friend Steve, and (2) head out to see Alice Cooper at the Peppermill Concert Hall. The show is at 7, and it's a 2 hour road trip, so there will be plenty of time for some drinking, gambling and a buffet meal before the show starts.
I have been excited all week for the show. I have not seen Alice perform in 22 years, and this is the first time in about ten years I have crossed state lines. I don't get out much anymore as my financial situation and school and family obligations don't permit me as much fun as I used to have, so it will be nice to actually go have some "fun" for a change.
The road trip to Wendover, Nevada is nothing at all to write home about. It's a barren desert landscape that has three highlights. (1) There is a surreal otherwordly feel to it as the dirt around the road is mostly salt, and at dusk, and with a bright moon, it's actually (sort of) inspiring. Think Joshua Tree landscape without the band and no trees or any living thing.(2) The "famous tree". Not THAT tree, but an artists idea of a bad christmas tree, or actually bad xmas tree ornaments. Sort of Dali-ish, but not as interesting. It's only a highlight because when one sees that tree, it means you are really close to getting to Wendover and your chosen buffet or casino. It also means you are about to NOT be in Utah anymore...which is a grand thrill on it's own. (3) You (kinda) get to see the Bonneville Salt Flats. I am not a car freak so it means almost nothing to me, but hey, it IS famous and one does get to be near it. Think having a pic with Bono's hair dresser while Bono is too busy to be bothered with you, and you get how I feel.
So, I am very excited. I have read all sorts of accolades about the show, and to see the show in an intimate (1950 people hall) atmosphere is a thrilling prospect to me as well. OH and yeah, the flask will be going on the long ride, too. It can only make it better :)
I'll post a review of the show as soon as time allows.
Have fun y'all!!
Sunday, September 20, 2009
The America I Know....
Greetings!
I woke up this Sunday morning with my head full of questions about what America has become, and where America's future lies.
I cannot help but wonder where America's courage has gone when the citizenship has been encouraged to be fearful about almost everything. We have been encouraged to buy plastic sheeting and duct tape because our government wanted us to be afraid in our own homes about some "pending terrorist attack". We were constantly barraged with "Terrorist Alert red/yellow/orange...etc" and we became constantly afraid.
In America today, we cannot fly with a full bottle of shampoo or mouthwash because we must be afraid of whats in our neighbors bottle. We must be willing to take off our shoes to get through airport screening because we have been asked to fear what's (possibly) in our neighbor's shoe.
In America, we gladly accepted the infringement of our government's wiretapping our calls to our friends and family while some politicians and old white men and talk radio hosts encourage a lot of citizens to be fearful of positive freedoms a majority of citizens voted to see take place in the last election. The majority wanted to see America have the courage to change, while a noisy, and fearful group wants everyone to be afraid.
"Be afraid of health care reform!!" the old fearful crowd shouts. "Be afraid of the president of the United States talking to your children!!" The old fearful crowd proclaims loudly. "Be afraid of socialism!!" The old fearful crowd shouts while they traverse to the library, public schools, and while they call socialist programs for help...like the fire department. "Be afraid of communism!!" The old loud fearful crowd shouts out while they wear sneakers and pants and t-shirts whose tag reads "made in China".
The old loud fearful crowd proclaims to be "a christian nation" but soon forget the words of Christ "Fear not, for I am with you." No, instead we simply give lip service to "being a brave American" while we cower in our basements with our plastic wrap and duct tape awaiting our "pending doom".
The America I know is not fearful. The America I know had the courage to send men to the moon. The America I know was brave enough to face the challenges of racism in the 1960's and pass a civil rights bill into law. The America I know will pass a civil rights bill for homosexuals in my lifetime.
The America I know has the courage to actually be a free nation. Free from fear. A bold nation who will take the correct action to make certain ALL Americans have available to them an affordable health care system where we are ALL able to maintain our health so we can compete with the world around us. A bold and fearless nation that encourages it's citizens to be brave, to boldly traverse the planet with no fear and with courage. The America I know is an inclusive nation, not an exclusive nation where "if you don't look like us, or worship like us, you are NOT one of us." NO!! we are NOT that kind of nation!!
We welcome ALL people, ESPECIALLY if you do not "look" like us..or worship like us. America wants to know you and love you and welcome you.
Maybe the old loud fearful crowd is afraid of themselves. Maybe they are afraid of their own prejudices, their own inclusiveness, there own self righteousness and maybe the old loud fearful crowd wants the American legacy to be a legacy of being afraid.
As the old loud fearful crowd has the courage to stand up and make all sorts of noise about what to be afraid of...I wish to stand up and proclaim that I WILL NOT BE AFRAID!!
America, DO NOT HAVE FEAR!! Stand up and be brave and be proud of the real America.
A nation that is brave and FEARLESS!!
To a bright future!!
I woke up this Sunday morning with my head full of questions about what America has become, and where America's future lies.
I cannot help but wonder where America's courage has gone when the citizenship has been encouraged to be fearful about almost everything. We have been encouraged to buy plastic sheeting and duct tape because our government wanted us to be afraid in our own homes about some "pending terrorist attack". We were constantly barraged with "Terrorist Alert red/yellow/orange...etc" and we became constantly afraid.
In America today, we cannot fly with a full bottle of shampoo or mouthwash because we must be afraid of whats in our neighbors bottle. We must be willing to take off our shoes to get through airport screening because we have been asked to fear what's (possibly) in our neighbor's shoe.
In America, we gladly accepted the infringement of our government's wiretapping our calls to our friends and family while some politicians and old white men and talk radio hosts encourage a lot of citizens to be fearful of positive freedoms a majority of citizens voted to see take place in the last election. The majority wanted to see America have the courage to change, while a noisy, and fearful group wants everyone to be afraid.
"Be afraid of health care reform!!" the old fearful crowd shouts. "Be afraid of the president of the United States talking to your children!!" The old fearful crowd proclaims loudly. "Be afraid of socialism!!" The old fearful crowd shouts while they traverse to the library, public schools, and while they call socialist programs for help...like the fire department. "Be afraid of communism!!" The old loud fearful crowd shouts out while they wear sneakers and pants and t-shirts whose tag reads "made in China".
The old loud fearful crowd proclaims to be "a christian nation" but soon forget the words of Christ "Fear not, for I am with you." No, instead we simply give lip service to "being a brave American" while we cower in our basements with our plastic wrap and duct tape awaiting our "pending doom".
The America I know is not fearful. The America I know had the courage to send men to the moon. The America I know was brave enough to face the challenges of racism in the 1960's and pass a civil rights bill into law. The America I know will pass a civil rights bill for homosexuals in my lifetime.
The America I know has the courage to actually be a free nation. Free from fear. A bold nation who will take the correct action to make certain ALL Americans have available to them an affordable health care system where we are ALL able to maintain our health so we can compete with the world around us. A bold and fearless nation that encourages it's citizens to be brave, to boldly traverse the planet with no fear and with courage. The America I know is an inclusive nation, not an exclusive nation where "if you don't look like us, or worship like us, you are NOT one of us." NO!! we are NOT that kind of nation!!
We welcome ALL people, ESPECIALLY if you do not "look" like us..or worship like us. America wants to know you and love you and welcome you.
Maybe the old loud fearful crowd is afraid of themselves. Maybe they are afraid of their own prejudices, their own inclusiveness, there own self righteousness and maybe the old loud fearful crowd wants the American legacy to be a legacy of being afraid.
As the old loud fearful crowd has the courage to stand up and make all sorts of noise about what to be afraid of...I wish to stand up and proclaim that I WILL NOT BE AFRAID!!
America, DO NOT HAVE FEAR!! Stand up and be brave and be proud of the real America.
A nation that is brave and FEARLESS!!
To a bright future!!
Friday, September 11, 2009
What College has Taught Me...So Far
Greetings!
When I made the decision to return to college and (finally) get my degree I had all sorts of concerns. It had been over 9 years since I had attended any college classes when I left due ti a divorce and then working 50-60 hours a week and not having time to go back to school.
This left me with about 4 semesters to go to complete my AS degree in General Ed. and also I found I could get an AS degree in Political Science by taking just a few more classes, so I decided to do this.
Back to my concerns. I was afraid that maybe I was a bit too old to hold an interest in the classes, but on the contrary, I have found my maturity and age and experiences to be very helpful as I have attended my classes. My ups and downs in life have made my essays a great read, better than I could have written at 32 (ten years ago when I stopped my schooling).
I was also afraid that maybe I would not have time to pursue my schooling with working as well, but this too has been a false worry. With the advent of online courses offered through my college here in town, I have the freedom to pursue my classes after work and on my own schedule, so long as my assignments are submitted by the deadlines posted.
So what have I learned so far?
I have to say I am thoroughly amazed by the insight college courses have given me about myself and how I interact with the world around me. Some notions that I thought I did not have did rear their ugly heads, and now I know to extinguish those things in my life. I have learned to see more than meets the eye in things I would not have noticed otherwise as well.
One important lesson I learned the other night while sitting in class (I am taking a live math class at my college due to testing in to a lower math grade..details following...) listening to my math 920 teacher (pre-algebra) and watching her show us how to do prime factorization without using a calculator (calculators are not allowed in class yet) it dawned on me exactly why I never really excelled in mathematics. It's because I don't like bullshit very much.
Now, this is not a reflection on the math course or the techer, the course and the teacher are excellent. But, my mind kept asking me "why the fuck do I need to do this without a calculator?" and "why the fuck do I need to do this...PERIOD???" These were the same thoughts I had in high school. I never heard any good explanation as to why a calculator could not or should not be used. It's a great tool.
In my head I equate not using a calculator for mathematics with building a campfire in your backyard..in the middle of the lawn...to cook dinner on when you have a stove and BBQ which makes it easier and more efficient. Better yet, it's like rubbing two sticks together to even light the damned things. OH and by the way, what time does the fucking sun dial say it is?
I learned the lesson of my disdain for bullshit, and it answered my questions as to why I never excelled in mathematic in a school setting. I mean, I can DO math, my career has depended on my ability to DO math. But I can look up any formulaes that I need and better yet...I can USE THE GREAT INVENTION CALLED A CALCULATOR to do the math.
All these years I had a fear of classroom math, even at times thinking that "my brain is not wired for math" or having self doubt about whether I was good enough to excel in school.
Well, my brain is fine, and I am good enough to do anything I want to do, and smart enough to decipher what I should do or want to do.
I just don't appreciate bullshit getting in my way!! :)
Thanks for reading! I urge you all, go back to school, or go to school if you have not started college yet!!
When I made the decision to return to college and (finally) get my degree I had all sorts of concerns. It had been over 9 years since I had attended any college classes when I left due ti a divorce and then working 50-60 hours a week and not having time to go back to school.
This left me with about 4 semesters to go to complete my AS degree in General Ed. and also I found I could get an AS degree in Political Science by taking just a few more classes, so I decided to do this.
Back to my concerns. I was afraid that maybe I was a bit too old to hold an interest in the classes, but on the contrary, I have found my maturity and age and experiences to be very helpful as I have attended my classes. My ups and downs in life have made my essays a great read, better than I could have written at 32 (ten years ago when I stopped my schooling).
I was also afraid that maybe I would not have time to pursue my schooling with working as well, but this too has been a false worry. With the advent of online courses offered through my college here in town, I have the freedom to pursue my classes after work and on my own schedule, so long as my assignments are submitted by the deadlines posted.
So what have I learned so far?
I have to say I am thoroughly amazed by the insight college courses have given me about myself and how I interact with the world around me. Some notions that I thought I did not have did rear their ugly heads, and now I know to extinguish those things in my life. I have learned to see more than meets the eye in things I would not have noticed otherwise as well.
One important lesson I learned the other night while sitting in class (I am taking a live math class at my college due to testing in to a lower math grade..details following...) listening to my math 920 teacher (pre-algebra) and watching her show us how to do prime factorization without using a calculator (calculators are not allowed in class yet) it dawned on me exactly why I never really excelled in mathematics. It's because I don't like bullshit very much.
Now, this is not a reflection on the math course or the techer, the course and the teacher are excellent. But, my mind kept asking me "why the fuck do I need to do this without a calculator?" and "why the fuck do I need to do this...PERIOD???" These were the same thoughts I had in high school. I never heard any good explanation as to why a calculator could not or should not be used. It's a great tool.
In my head I equate not using a calculator for mathematics with building a campfire in your backyard..in the middle of the lawn...to cook dinner on when you have a stove and BBQ which makes it easier and more efficient. Better yet, it's like rubbing two sticks together to even light the damned things. OH and by the way, what time does the fucking sun dial say it is?
I learned the lesson of my disdain for bullshit, and it answered my questions as to why I never excelled in mathematic in a school setting. I mean, I can DO math, my career has depended on my ability to DO math. But I can look up any formulaes that I need and better yet...I can USE THE GREAT INVENTION CALLED A CALCULATOR to do the math.
All these years I had a fear of classroom math, even at times thinking that "my brain is not wired for math" or having self doubt about whether I was good enough to excel in school.
Well, my brain is fine, and I am good enough to do anything I want to do, and smart enough to decipher what I should do or want to do.
I just don't appreciate bullshit getting in my way!! :)
Thanks for reading! I urge you all, go back to school, or go to school if you have not started college yet!!
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